Draft of written speech

Opening paragraph

I believe that people need to be more aware of the affects of concussions. My story: I got my concussion on April 19th, 2014. I was at a tournament in Philadelphia playing for my husky volleyball, my club team. We were playing a team from Baltimore and they had huge girls who hit very hard. One girl went up to hit and hit me straight in the face with the ball and I fell down and was on the ground for a long time. My mom and sister rushed over and I went to the trainer at the tournament. They immediately made me leave the gym and leave Philadelphia as a whole because I would not be able to play the rest of the weekend. I was not allowed to watch my team finish their tournament. Everyone knew, on impact, that I was concussed. During that game, I was being recruited to play college volleyball. After going to multiple doctors, I was told I will never be able to play volleyball again. But, after begging and begging, my neurologist allowed me to play for my high school team my senior year. 

Body Paragraph

Marc Savard is a hockey player in the NHL. He is one of many hockey players who suffered from concussions. Mark Savards story: Mark Savard is one of many hockey players who suffered from a major concussion. His story is similar to mine. On March 7, 2010, Savard stepped on the ice for the first time since he last got injured in January of the same year. He ended up getting a concussion in the third period of that game, but eventually recovered. On January 23, 2011, Savard then suffered a second concussion on a hit by former Bruin Matt Hunwick in a game against the Colorado Avalanche. On February 8, 2011, the Bruins opted to shut Savard down for the season after he received his second concussion in ten months. The Bruins went on to win the Stanley Cup, defeating the Vancouver Canucks in seven games. Due to recurring symptoms of post-concussion syndrome, Savard was not able to travel to Vancouver to take part in the on-ice victory celebration with his teammates, but he was able to join them back in Boston for the official victory parade. This is important because Savard wasn't even able to watch his team in the Stanley cup finals.

Statistics:

• 50% of "second impact syndrome" incidents - brain injury caused from a premature return to activity after suffering initial injury (concussion) - result in death. This is important because it shows how severe concussions are.
• 400,000 brain injuries (concussions) occurred in high school athletics during the 2008-09 school year.this shows how affective concussions are to young high school athletes.
• 15.8% of football players who sustain a concussion severe enough to cause loss of consciousness return to play the same day. This shows that people don't take action right after impact and continue to play through their injury which just makes it worse.
• High school athletes who have been concussed are three times more likely to suffer another concussion in the same season. This shows that the more concussions you have, the more prone you are to getting them.

Conclusion

In conclusion, people need to take concussions more seriously. People over look their symptoms and don't get help. Something I want everyone to take away from this is: don't take concussions lightly and let yourself heal before going back to your sport. What's more important? Finishing out the game or living a more healthy and safe life? 

Ted talk outline

Intro: share my story and state how it's affected me and "I believe that people need to be more aware of the affects of concussions"
Body: show pictures of a brain and how concussions can change your brain, Marc Savards story, how concussions can happen to anyone at anytime but mostly just the long term and short term affects it has on teens
Conclusion: restate what I believe and how to prevent getting a concussion

Research for Ted talk

Concussions are more serious than people think they are

My story: I got my concussion on April 19th, 2014. I was at a tournament in Philadelphia playing for my husky volleyball, my club team. We were playing a team from Baltimore and they had huge girls who hit very hard. One girl went up to hit and hit me straight in the face with the ball and I fell down and was on the ground for a long time. My mom and sister rushed over and I went to the trainer at the tournament. They immediately made me leave the gym and leave Philadelphia as a whole because I would not be able to play the rest of the weekend. I was not allowed to watch my team finish their tournament. Everyone knew, on impact, that I was concussed. During that game, I was being recruited to play college volleyball. After going to multiple doctors, I was told I will never be able to play volleyball again. But, after begging and begging, my neurologist allowed me to play for my high school team my senior year. 

Mark Savards story: Mark Savard is one of many hockey players who suffered from a major concussion. His story is similar to mine. On March 7, 2010, Savard stepped on the ice for the first time since he last got injured in January of the same year. He ended up getting a concussion in the third period of that game, but eventually recovered. On January 23, 2011, Savard then suffered a second concussion on a hit by former Bruin Matt Hunwick in a game against the Colorado Avalanche. On February 8, 2011, the Bruins opted to shut Savard down for the season after he received his second concussion in ten months. The Bruins went on to win the Stanley Cup, defeating the Vancouver Canucks in seven games. Due to recurring symptoms of post-concussion syndrome, Savard was not able to travel to Vancouver to take part in the on-ice victory celebration with his teammates, but he was able to join them back in Boston for the official victory parade. This is important because Savard wasn't even able to watch his team in the Stanley cup finals.

Statistics:

• 50% of "second impact syndrome" incidents - brain injury caused from a premature return to activity after suffering initial injury (concussion) - result in death.
• Female high school soccer athletes suffer almost 40% more concussions than males (29,000 annually)
• Female high school basketball players suffer 240% more concussions than males (13,000).
• 400,000 brain injuries (concussions) occurred in high school athletics during the 2008-09 school year.
• 15.8% of football players who sustain a concussion severe enough to cause loss of consciousness return to play the same day.
• Emergency department visits for concussions sustained during organized team sports doubled among 8-13 year olds between 1997 and 2007 and nearly tripled among older youth.
• Concussion rates more than doubled among students age 8-19 participating in sports like basketball, soccer and football between 1997-2007, even as participation in those sports declined.
• A 2011 study of U.S. high schools with at least one athletic trainer on staff found that concussions accounted for nearly 15% of all sports related injuries reported to athletic trainers.
• High school athletes who have been concussed are three times more likely to suffer another concussion in the same season.
• Females aged 10-19 years sustained sports- and recreation-related TBIs most often while playing soccer or basketball or whole bicycling.
• More than 248,000 children visited hospital emergency departments in 2009 for concussions and other traumatic brain injuries related to sports and recreation.
• Injuries associated with participation in sports and recreational activities account for 21% of all traumatic brain injuries among children in the United States

Ted talk critique and sources

Sources for my own Ted talk:
-myself, my story about my own concussion
-story about mark savvard hockey player on the Bruins who had too many concussions so he had to stop playing
-Www.clearedtoplay.org/concussion-information/concussions-by-the-numbers
-www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2491929

Cameron Russell: looks aren't everything. believe me, I'm a model. (The link wouldn't work)
-she seems really nervous
-no one really laughs at her jokes
-first outfit change on the ted stage
-able to transform what the audience thinks of her by what she's wearing
-changes from a scandalous dress to a conservative long skirt and flats
-"image is powerful and also superficial"
-surgery and fake tans transform how you look superficially
-uses a PowerPoint to display her pictures
-talks about questions she's asked such as "how did you become a model", "do you get a lot of free stuff?", "can I be a model when I grow up?" "Do they retouch all of the photos"
-uses humor.. Why would you want to be a model when you could be anything in the world, the president of the United states, a ninja cardio-thoracic surgeon poet
-shows her own work
-the take away to this talk: feel more comfortable acknowledging the power of image in our perceived successes and our perceived failures

http://youtu.be/4tMH-NFjm5Y

Ideas for Ted talks

-Technology now vs then
-how women are thought of now vs then
-how concussions have affected my life